首先检查一下自己
There are so many relevant sayings about self-care here; you can’t pour from an empty vessel, 先戴上氧气面罩, 等. The bottom line: if you feel a friend needs support, check in with yourself to see what you are capable of doing. 你的 只有 responsibility is to navigate these conversations with compassion for both yourself 和 your friend. If supporting someone else is leading you to neglect your own responsibilities in favor of the other person’s, you’re disrespecting your friend’s autonomy (see below) 和 you’re ab和oning your own obligations, it may be time to draw a boundary. You are absolutely allowed to tell your friend, “I can’t help you with this anymore.” Protecting your own energy is a legitimate, healthy 和 positive choice.
尊重自主权
最恭敬的, responsible thing you can do is to create space for your friend to make their own decisions. 想要加入, make decisions 和 be directive is a common instinct in folks who want to help their friends. However, this often takes away the autonomy of the person you’re trying to help. 你的 role is to be their friend, not a clinician.
Listen for underst和ing, not persuasion
No matter how much sense you make, how sure you are about what a friend should do, 和 how clearly 和 articulately you express your opinion—attempting to persuade a friend to do things your way disrespects their autonomy. When you’re sitting with someone, try to focus on really hearing what they’re saying rather than formulating a response. Reflect back to them what they say 和 make sure you really underst和 what they’re experiencing. A strategy for doing this is to avoid the word “但.而不是“你想感觉好点。 但 you don’t want to take medication,” which closes a door; instead, try “You want to feel better 和 you don't want to take medication,” which opens the door to what they might want to do.